A swing

Ryan pushed too hard today. Again, a stream of insults and jibes poured from his mouth. It wasn’t directed at me this time, though. He decided to pick a new target this youth group, instead of going for me. I guess I’m just not that appealing anymore, considering I hardly react. No, he decided to go at Cassia.

As soon as I walked in, I could tell what was going on. He was standing there by her. She was drawing in her book, trying to ignore the asshole who wanted to make her life miserable. I heard his words as I walked closer. I heard the misogynistic insults, the chauvinistic desires, the conformist pride spilling from him at her.

And she just took it. Is that what I look like? She just took it.

I couldn’t. I have some monster telling me I’m on his hit list. I dream every night about being chased by a mass of tentacles that infects everything around me. I see him daily: on the tree line, in the mall, on the deck of my goddamn boat. I didn’t need more stress. The fact that this time it was coming from something human, something I knew, something I could affect…

The pastor sent me home early tonight. It was worth it. My parents yelled at me the whole way home. It was worth it. Seeing that asshole doubled over in pain was worth it.

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